Founded by Dr. MewgraveWarning:
Treatment is not guaranteed. Some of the advice may actually help.
Now accepting owners
The Catchiatry Institute diagnoses the people who live with cats.
Begin intake
Common presentations
Owners rarely come in for themselves. These are the reasons they come in anyway.
Gets up at 3:07 a.m. when looked at. Believes this was a choice.
Cannot stand up while someone is asleep on them. Has missed meals, meetings and one flight.
Has not sat in their own armchair since spring. Describes this as sharing.
Owns four thousand photographs of the same cat asleep. Is taking another one now.
Recognize yourself? Begin intake.
Admission procedure
About you, not the cat. The cat has already been assessed.
Issued by Dr. Mewgrave. Signed, sealed and final.
Appeals are reviewed by the cat.
From the case files
Patient states that he is in charge of the household. On questioning, the cat decides when dinner is served, when doors are opened and where the patient sits. The patient decides when he sits down. He then waits to be allowed to stand up.
Treatment · Standing-up rehearsal, three times daily. Slowly, as if someone were asleep on him.
Catchiatry Institute Press
A handbook for the partner of a cat owner.
For anyone who loves a cat owner and has noticed where they rank.
Nine sessions, Form T-2, the Final Exam (Form F-9) and the Approved Partner diploma. Plus print-ready pages: a referral for handing the book over, the diploma, the exam, Form T-2, a price list and eight rules for the fridge. One PDF.
Diploma included. Cat's signature not guaranteed.
See the bookInstitute Bulletin
A new case file and the cat's official position.
One case a week. Unsubscribe at any time. Your address is used only for the Bulletin. Privacy notice
